17 Minute Swim

17 Min Swim
700 yds
41.17 yds/min

I know you're asking yourself, "Geek, why is there a picture of Harvey Firestein, star of stage and screen, at the top of a post about swimming?"  Oh, gentle reader, we'll get there, just keep reading...

It's a recovery week for my Tri training (as well as P90X) which means shorter training sessions.  I went to the gym today after work for a short swim (17 min), followed by a short bike ride (35 min).  The swim was pretty good, I did 700 yards and really focused on my stroke technique.  The swim is all about technique and efficiency.  I NEED to get more efficient in the water.  I am horribly slow and inefficient right now.  My stroke count per length is 20-21, I think it should be more like 13-15.  I decided that I need to have a swim coach dissect my stroke and help me with some drills. There's a trainer at my gym that does lots of triathlons that I think I'm going to hire to break down my stroke and help me get better.  More on that in a later post, I'm sure.

The real story comes after the swim, which brings us to Harvey up there.  So I finish my swim and head into the locker room to change into some shorts and a shirt so I can hop on a stationary bike.  While I'm doing the combination to my locker a guy comes out of the shower, a guy who looks and sounds stunningly similar to Harvey Firestein, but with bigger earrings in both ears - oh and buck naked - and asks me (no kidding) "Do you wax your back? I waxed mine once and it hurt like hell.  I also shaved 'down there' once but since I'm not 'cut' after words it felt like a razor blade between my thighs." 

Wha?  Did he really just ask me that and tell me that?  And WTF, I've been aquainted with him for about 10 seconds and now I have both verbal and visual confirmation that he was never circumsized.  This is entirely too much information for a casual locker room conversation.  Harvey continued to talk and give me the once over - yeah, I'm pretty sure he was checking me out - in the locker room - naked - and I'll admit it...it was weird.  

I was friendly and chatted with him about something for a minute or two, trying to get my clothes on and get out the door.  Then he says, "Do you dive? 'Cause once I went to a lake and jumped off of a platform that flopped my belly pretty good and it hurt.  My wife told me that was a pretty stupid thing to do.  I suppose we all do stuipid things when we're young."

Oh, I see what you did there, Harvey.  Nice attempt at trying to manuver your way back into the closet with that wife comment, but I'm afraid that's not going to work.  Having a 2 minute naked conversation with a guy you just met which include the topics 1) waxing your back, 2) your nether regions, and 3) your abundance of foreskin,  all while you are taking uncomfortably long looks at my abs...I don't think your half-hearted comment about your fake wife is going to convince anyone of anything. 

Harvey, perhaps next time we should ease into naked conversations with strangers.